Deceptive Disguises Natal Ascendant
We are all endowed with a unique personality which acts as a personified mask. A verifiable one that we wear in order to protect our innermost emotions, until at some point, when and IF we choose to reveal more about ourselves. In astrology, this particular mask is referred to as the Ascendant or Rising Sign. The inferred role carries with it a heavy burden; for, in actuality, we are the first ones who must break through the illusive aspects in order to see who we really are and what makes us tick.
Some may ascribe more meaning to these these recognizable, yet sometimes changeable, characteristics, (which appear to be genuinely real) more credence than necessarily deserved. When in fact, the personality traits are used as protective/defense mechanisms in order to cope, evolve, transmute and shed. One does not have to be well-versed in astrology to understand (fully appreciate)given these ideas, but more often than not, zodiac symbolic associations make for easier comprehension and assimilation.
Within the first house of the astrological MODE of Cosmic Therapy Esoteric Psychological Natal Chart, certain aspects of personality are located which reinforce the noble idea of a sacredly secret 'code of honor'; one's very own personal set of sanctified ethics, established and maintained while alive. These ethics have nothing whatsoever to do with ethics as you understand them but moreover the ability to do nothing else until you are able to cut through the bull malarkey attached to the false idea in your familiar personality as recognized. In other words, cease trying to smooth things over. Remove the idea that you need to make something better than what it appears to be.
Whatever matter presented, (in its full entirety), with all of the extenuating complications associated, always presents itself in the exact manner and solicited circumstances, as needed for the moment of experience. In fact, it's is unconsciously desired by you. No longer do you need to expend unnecessary effort in trying to prove how much of a decent, kind, loving interested and devoted person you are. You are what you are (sublimely, celestially intact) and that is far more than any pretentiously glamorized picture you try to paint or insist for others paint about you by having them succumb to your fictitious righteousness. A huge amount of life-sustaining energy is required and vested in trying to keep up the facade.
You are to be loyal to no one until you can be loyal to yourself first and foremost. After that, your undying loyalty cannot be disputed, ever. For those of you who are astrologically savvy, the sign on the first house symbolically reminds you of first mask you must rip away. The indomitable lessons associated are the ones to be cast into the sea of forgetfulness. How ironic, this information sounds, but none the less true, you will ultimately be called upon to relinquish the preciously coveted ideas you hold about your self (whether good or bad), in addition to the conditioned, ingrained ways of attaining information from various unfamiliar or seemingly unacceptable sources.
If at any time you do not move through the applied roles (cleverly implanted disguises) without full autonomy, the curse of ambiguity noted will engulf you in totality. You will continually complain and bemoan your lot in life, blame others and yourself for situations beyond your human control. You will wonder why you have been denied your most cherished dreams. This act alone is not only stupid but hopelessly futile.
Just as thinking that astrological signs have power within and of themselves; they do not. They are used merely as symbolic representations to educate and enlighten various 'hard to express and describe' truths. For example, when you see the color 'red' it means many things (if you ascribe to various associations), to many people. One of the connotations would be anger, another, vibrant sexuality and yet another, "Stop, danger" when one considers using it as an recognizable icon of the octagon 'stop sign'.
When you begin to pat yourself on the back or desecrate your character,(the same act in reverse), which reinforces a conception of how well or how badly you've performed the functions of the particular 1st house role assigned, cease immediately. You are wallowing in a self-intoxicating flood of aggravating distractions and alluring immobilization tactics. You have moved away from the lessons attached into the fractured thoughts of what you think you ought to do, have done, or should do. Stop it! Falling into a numbed state of habitual monotony happens too soon and too often.
Whatever you consider yourself 'to be endowed with or to be good at', you are, in fact, working through the contrary bulk of the specific traits of the sign's negative implications, in order to assimilate the lessons attached. If the 1st house works its personality magic appropriately, you grow past any and all labels associated, continuing to evolve in hallowed proportions. You are never to gaze at your ennobled personality with self-idolatry accompanied by any idea of specialness and favoritism. Look closely at the sign on the cusp to examine the nature you have exalted or debased in yourself. Neither one is accurate.
You have been overly concerned with these self-flagellating matters; most especially how others perceive you in regards to their emphasis. Example: Scorpio---need to be seen as 'right', power driven persona, sexual abuse, sexual degradation, manipulative guilt tactics, shocking choice of sexual partners, hoarding, possessiveness, lies, deceit, jealousy, need to be looked up to, sexual obsession, superior attitude, prostitution, high minded, refusal to let go of grudges, living two separate lives, obsessed with matters of death, impervious desire to be seen as decent, financial security, mafia type control in families, and relationship bondage. (These are but a few of the elements of possible areas you will be shuttled through in order to remove your preconditioned ideas)
Nothing you have ever done, will do or are doing this very minute makes one bit of difference to anyone but you! You are working through enormous ego complexes by remaining identified with the role assigned. Whether that be guilt, remorse, regret, resentment, shame, disgrace, embarrassment, scandal, hatred, dishonor, and/or humiliation/embarrassment, the non-identification of these scenarios are the biology slides of your redemption. The sign on your 1st house (along with planets; another session on that) will indicate ludicrous ways in which you set about to show your worth, prove your merit, establish your role of superiority and set yourself apart as one who knows.
You know nothing except whatever it is you are facing at the moment. The next moment may be entirely different with a 180 degree turn, but it too will be accurate. You must shift with the glacier of fresh experience without holding on to the old patterns of habitual behavior. You are in the process of learning(experiencing) how to perform a virtuoso brilliant performance of remembering who you are.
You have no need to stop the flood of disasters you perceive are standing at the gate. Fling the door open and invite your self-imposed demons in. How will you ever rid their negative influence if you don't acknowledge their intrusion? You are the one creating the demonstrated veil of hypocrisy. The color of your precious ruthless soul's intent reflects the sign on the first house cusp. Therefore, you must make use of the worst possible scenarios, the sign supposedly offers. Do not seek to be validated and approved in your 1st house cusp role. It's only the tip of the iceberg.
How have you manipulated circumstances to make the episodes of that colored flavor house palatable? What have you dressed up, dolled down, turned and twisted to get the preferred acceptable outcome? No one other than you knows these answers. Forget about trying to uphold the false front. In order to live your expanded cosmic existence to the fullest, [barring no exceptions and preferences] do that which is called for under the flag of the 1st house sign's cusp fully exploited. IF it be Aquarius, do not expel one moment's worth of energy in trying to prove you are, have been or will be a good mother. Your task lies in 'standing firm' in the face of it appearing to be contrary.
Do not shut down, shut out, or close up by projecting manipulating tactics of underscored attention to your children and/or others. IF and when the occasion arises that you are labeled cold hearted, unfeeling, unjust, unfair, and uncaring, you have just begun to see the thickness of your deceptive mask. Relish in these sacred times. Always remember old ingrained habits die hard!
Discover the veil of pretension hidden in the sign on your 1st house cusp. This house is where you are the most craftily, deceitful.
Unless you pierce the shroud of your needing to seen, accepted and revered in the realm of whatever symbolic category of the sign on your 1st house, you have in no wise begun to penetrate into your zodiacal soul's intent. And, to be out of touch with your soul's intent is the true meaning of burning in hell fire. You are in the process of tapping into the source spring of galactic liberating powerful truth by convincing yourself of your own worth then dismounting the horse of self-aggrandizement to walk upon holy ground with your unclad feet of radical authenticity.
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